


Turn It All Around

by lalalenii



Category: Glee
Genre: BABB 2015, Blaine Big Bang, Blam, Bullying, Coming Out, Friendship, Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, LGBTQ Themes, M/M, blina
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-11
Updated: 2016-03-11
Packaged: 2018-05-26 02:06:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 18,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6219415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lalalenii/pseuds/lalalenii
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Blaine’s life is turned upside down when a move forces him to leave the safe bubble he’s built for himself at Dalton Academy after being driven away from public school due to all the bullying. But things seem to start looking up when he meets Kurt, a recent graduate from his new school, and his friend Elliott through an LGBT club in Columbus. With the help of his friends being open about himself doesn’t feel quite as daunting anymore.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Turn It All Around

**Author's Note:**

> This has been my baby since last August and I'm so happy to be finally able to share it!  
> Big big thanks to Anna, who helped letting this idea take shape and come to live. Thank you to Abbi the best beta(bean) I could ever ask for, without you I would still be stuck writing that one scene. And of course, my wonderful artist @gleekmom, thank you for visualizing something I didn’t even think of.  
> Thanks to Pace and Anna for hosting this, allowing so many amazing people to share their talent. Thank you to Amanda, Clou, Yas and everyone on twitter who helped with little tidbits and background information.  
> Thanks to the composers of the The Flash soundtrack because it makes badass background noise for writing. Thanks to the writers, creators and actors of glee who provided us with such lovely characters that still are a part of our daily lives even a year after the show ended.  
> And last but not least, thank you to my readers, because a year ago I never could have imagined participating in something like this. 
> 
> Enough of babbling now, I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I did writing it.

 

Blaine is checking his watch for the fifth time in ten minutes as he wonders how Cooper always manages to talk him into these kind of things.

_“You have to drive me to that audition in Columbus, squirt,” his brother had insisted._

_“After exposing myself during the audition and showing so much raw emotion, I will be in no state to drive.”_

Blaine knows it’s just an excuse, that Cooper is just too lazy to drive himself, but it also feels a little bit like retaliation for all the times their parents made Cooper drive Blaine to things once he got his license. He doesn’t actually mind the driving, it’s fun. It’s the waiting he hates, because Cooper said he would be finished at 2. It’s almost 3 now.

He sighs, drawing his jacket sleeve back over his wrist to block out some of the crisp air brought in by the new year. He shrugs his shoulders, burying his face into his scarf some more. He’d give anything for a hot cup of coffee right now, but he knows if he leaves now, Cooper will come out and then chide him for making him wait. He doesn’t need that extra stress right now.

A voice interrupts his train of thought. “Excuse me?” Blaine looks up to face a young man with a roll of posters tucked under his left arm, a box of pins clutched in his hands.

“Can you move a sec, I need to hang up this poster,” he explains, nodding to the roll under his arm.

“Oh! Of course, sorry,” Blaine says, stepping away from the poster wall he had been standing in front of.

“No worries,” the boy assures him before turning to his work. He seems to be about college age, and Blaine notices with a blush that his profile is very handsome.

Trying to distract himself, he studies the poster the boy is pinning to the wall. His stomach twists as he realizes that the poster is announcing the meetings of a coming out support group in Columbus. It’s the topic he’s been trying to avoid ever since his parents had told him he would have to leave Dalton and go back to public school.

 _“It’s been ages Blaine, get over it!”_ his dad had told him.

But his dad was not the one who had nightmares for months, nightmares that came back once it was for certain that he’d have attend a public school again.

The boy must have noticed his change in demeanor and misread it, because he turns to Blaine and says with a little hostility, “Is there a problem?”

He acts nonchalant as he continues to pinup his poster neatly, but his jaw is set defensively.

“Gosh, no. Uhm, it’s not that,” Blaine says, turning away awkwardly. Now the guy thinks he’s homophobic, great. The boy relaxes a little, frowning as he looks at Blaine.

He hesitates, before asking, “Sore spot?”

Blaine hates the way his cheeks flush, he’s not embarrassed about being gay, he’s proud, goddammit, and it shouldn’t be so hard to admit to a stranger, especially to someone who seems comfortable with the topic, who might even be gay himself. But every time he does, he feels like that fourteen year old boy again, in a dark school parking lot, body aching and so, so scared.

"If you're having problems you should come," the guy suggests, gesturing to the poster.

It's kind of tacky, all rainbow colours and bold font.

"I'll be fine," Blaine mumbles. He's not having problems, he just needs to stop being such a coward.

The guy snorts. "That's what they always say."

Blaine just raises his eyebrows.

"Look I can't force you to come to the support group, but I know from experience that talking helps."

Blaine still doesn't reply, he doesn't want to be rude, he just doesn't know what to say.

"Or you can also just stop by, we have a public common room, lots of the LGBT kids just come there to hang out, and there's always an adult."

At that, Blaine perks up. The Warblers' acceptance is such a blessing, but it gets so lonely sometimes, not having anyone to talk. And he might need somewhere to escape soon enough.

"It would make me very happy if you came by. I'm Kurt, by the way."

"Blaine," he says, shaking the hand Kurt extends for him. "Uhm. I don't live around here though."

"Oh. That's a bummer.” Something lets Blaine know it’s not just a meaningless phrase, that guy actually seems to care, although he doesn’t even know him. “Where are you from?"

"Westerville, but I'm about to move to Lima. I'm just here with my brother, he's auditioning," he explains, gesturing to the office behind him.

"Oh. Then you’ve got no excuse, Lima isn’t that far. I should know, I make the drive almost every day."

"You’re from Lima? Really?”

"Yes,” Kurt chuckles. “That is not something you make up to impress people."

Kurt seems to see Blaine's face fall, because he rushes to add, "Well, it’s not that bad. It can be really nice once you’ve found your place.” He gives Blaine an encouraging smile which he returns half-heartedly. He’s still not sure how he feels about Lima. At least they seem to have cute guys, he thinks.

“Well, I gotta run, I have to put all of these up before my hands freeze off,” Kurt says, waggling his bare fingers for emphasis.

“Oh, okay.” Blaine surprises himself with how disappointed he sounds.

“Just, try to stop by one day if you can? It’s really fun. I’ve met great people there.” Kurt digs into his coat pocket and produces a card, handing it to Blaine.

It reads, “ _Q & A - Queers and Allies in Columbus_”, the address and opening hours plus some contact details listed below.

He pockets the card with a smile.

“I’ll think about it,” he promises, although he already knows he’ll do his best to make it. There is no LGBT* group at Dalton, not to mention his old school. He’s always jealous when he sees all the amazing and cool things queer groups do that get reported on BuzzFeed. Maybe this is his chance. And maybe he’ll even meet a cute guy. One that isn’t miles out of his league.

“Fantastic,” Kurt says with a flashing grin. “I really have to go now though. But chin up, okay? It’s cheesy, but you’re never alone.” With that and a quick squeeze of Blaine’s shoulder Kurt rushes off.

“Bye,” Blaine mumbles quietly, waving at Kurt until he disappears around the corner.

Thankfully Cooper appears soon later and he can finally warm himself up in the car. Cooper remains silent about the audition, saying that he’s not allowed to give anything away, which Blaine knows means he didn’t get it.

 

**

 

Kurt and the group are always on the back of his mind, but the next week is chaotic and busy as his family packs up their household and moves it two hours away.

Blaine is nervous about starting school somewhere new again. Although he knows he’s good at small talk and can easily charm people, he barely sleeps the night before his first day.

He’s relieved to find that it’s nowhere near as intimidating as he thought it would be. It’s the beginning of the year, so the students are mostly busy talking about what presents they got and who kissed who at the New Year’s party. Of course they’re curious about the new kid, but many grow tired of it after the second day and apart from a few friendly conversations with his desk partners he is mostly met with apathy.

Then again, nobody knows he is gay. At least, that’s what he hopes.

However that also means that he doesn’t really make friends, not knowing who he can trust, and it’s not like he can just walk up to someone and ask them if they have a problem with gay guys.

Then Cooper announces he got hired for some big commercial requiring him to move to LA, which Blaine knows was only a matter of time but nonetheless he’s never felt more alone.

But now that the stress and chaos of moving is over, he has time to look more into the organization the guy in Columbus told him about.

Blaine had signed up for a newsletter on the website of Q&A, informing him of upcoming events. When he gets an email announcing a get-together to celebrate the New Year, he decides to go. The website said that there was no need for him to sign up, so he just buys a few packs of cookies in the supermarket to avoid showing up empty-handed and goes.

 

**

 

The address is easy to find; he parks his car in a garage nearby and from there it’s just a five minute walk. The building itself is pretty nondescript, a regular apartment building with only a small plaque next to the door indicating that Q&A holds its meetings there. The front door is open, so Blaine slips in looking for any indication as to where to go next.

Thankfully, there are arrows stuck to the wall, leading the way. Blaine can hear the music and chatter before he turns around the corner. There is another open door, light pouring out into the hallway.

He takes a deep breath and reflexively lifts a hand to smooth over his hair. He reassures himself that it’s going to be fine, he’s good at small talk and he loves meeting new people.

The apartment looks homely and immediately makes him feel welcome. There are about ten people gathered in what is intended to be the living room, standing or sitting in small groups. Blaine feels weird just walking in, so he knocks on the doorframe to announce his presence.

“Hi,” he says timidly as several heads turn into his direction.

“Blaine!” The boy who invited him to the group comes from what appears to be the kitchen and walks toward him. Relief floods Blaine. He does like making friends and he’s an outgoing person, but it’s always less awkward if you know someone already. Well, not that he really knows Kurt, but he’s a familiar face at least.

“Hey!” he says with a smile. Kurt puts a hand on his shoulder, drags him into the room.

“Guys, meet Blaine,” he announces. Everyone smiles at him, some look curious and a few wave at him. He feels honestly welcome.

“All right, I’ll get him some punch and then you can start interrogating him.”

Kurt draws him into the small kitchen, grabs a mug from the shelf and starts filling it with the fruity smelling beverage.

“Don’t worry,” he says when he catches Blaine glancing towards the main room.

“They’re all great people, even though if some of them come off a little abrasive. You can stay as long as you want, and there’s no obligation to come back, although we’d be happy to have you.”

“Thanks,” Blaine replies, accepting the mug Kurt hands him.

Kurt senses his hesitation. “Any questions?”

Blaine huffs out a delighted laugh; Kurt obviously cares about this organisation and he’s actually making Blaine want to talk about all the things he never does.

“Are there any plans for today? Or is it just… drinking punch and talking?”

“Just punch and talking,” Kurt promises. “It’s all casual, we keep the serious stuff for the meetings.”

“Okay.” Blaine squares his shoulders. Casual he can do.

There is a knock on the door frame and a petite redhead sticks her head in.

“Kurt? Some people have questions about the upcoming projects.”

“Sure, I’ll be right there. You gonna be okay?” he asks Blaine.

Blaine nods encouragingly, gesturing for him to go ahead.

“Okay, see you later then.”

When Blaine follows him into the kitchen he’s already thriving with the feeling of new beginnings and the positive atmosphere surrounding him.

 

**

 

It’s the first day back in school and Blaine is still reeling with the energy from the party at the weekend.

Apart from the Pride in Columbus Cooper had dragged him to in his admittedly sweet attempt to show his support, Blaine had never been in such a diverse group, and he didn’t even get to talk to everyone.

He mostly talked to Rachel, Kurt’s best friend from high school who lives in New York and grew up with two dads in Ohio, a topic which she is happy to answer any questions to, as she had reassured him multiple times.

There was also Andy, a funny journalist who is quick to inform him that they refuse to let themself be conformed to any of the preconceived sexuality or gender spectrums.

And obviously Kurt. Who looked really gorgeous in his designer shirt and made sure to check in with Blaine several times that evening. Before Blaine left he had even insisted they exchange numbers and made Blaine promise he’d call if he ever had any trouble.

It was also relieving, almost therapeutic, being able to tell people he was gay, and not having to fear any backlash.

School seems a lot less scary now that he also starts to find his way around. At lunch he sits with Sam, who he met in the Superhero Sidekick Appreciation Club, the only one he has signed up for so far. Sam loves doing impressions, and he’s good at it too, so most of their conversations consist of Blaine guessing the impression and Sam high-fiving him if he gets it right.

Maybe public school isn’t too bad, Blaine thinks.

But when Sam asks him if he has a girlfriend, he just shakes his head no, shame and guilt settling heavy in his stomach, reality crashing down on him, destroying the bubble of carelessness that had built up inside of him faster than it hat built up.

Sam is nice, but he’s a football player and Blaine knows most football players don’t fancy hanging out with the gay kid. So he keeps quiet.

 

**

 

Kurt provides a welcome distraction when he texts Blaine later in the week, asking him if he wants to join him to help out at the Lima soup kitchen. At the party he had told Blaine that they volunteer outside of the center as much as they can. Blaine is quick to agree, he loves helping people, and maybe he can add the hours to his community service for the national honors society.

Kurt tells him he’ll pick him up from school on Friday so they can go together and Blaine tries to not let his answer sound too enthusiastic.

The high Blaine had from the party slowly vanishes. After Superhero Sidekicks of course, the most frequently discussed topic in the Superhero Sidekick appreciation Club is _girls_.

It’s not really surprising, Blaine hangs around on tumblr and etcetera enough to know what the male ‘nerd’ community is like, but it’s still unnerving. He tries to stay out of these conversations as much as possible, hoping they just consider him a shy, nerdy virgin (which he kind of is) and leave him be. The guys in the club are nice, but Blaine is annoyed by the time they say goodbye on Friday, having spent most of the meeting discussing whether it would be appropriate to take a girl to a superhero movie on a first date. Despite the sexist undertones Blaine doesn’t see what that has to do with how underrated Bucky Barnes and Dick Grayson are.

When Kurt pulls up in front of the school however, Blaine feels his good mood return, as if all his worries were left on school grounds and he is putting more and more distance between them.

In his car, Kurt briefs him on what they do in the kitchen - Blaine will help cooking the food, while Kurt works at the front, preparing the tables and portioning food donations than can be taken away.

“Elliott is in the back as well,” Kurt informs him as they turn into an alley to the back entrance of the soup kitchen. Blaine scans his mind for an Elliott not remembering having ever met one. Maybe he forgot, but there weren’t that many people at the party, so either he’s horribly forgetful or-

“He wasn’t at the party, but he’s been with Q&A for years,” Kurt adds and Blaine sighs with relief.

Kurt opens a door and gestures for Blaine to walk in. They take off their coats and he leads Blaine to the kitchen, then calls out: “Elliott?”

A man appears from behind a stack of wooden vegetable boxes. He’s even taller than Kurt, has a tan and tattoos and piercings and an outfit that gives him some kind of rock star aura but his friendly smile makes him look down to earth and approachable.

“This is Blaine,” Kurt introduces.

“Pleasure to meet you, I’m Elliott.” He shakes Blaine’s hand with a firm grip, then turns to Kurt.

“So when you said you’d bring a potato peeler you didn’t mention he would be this cute.”

Blaine blushes at the unexpected compliment, while Kurt just shakes his head.

“What? I’m serious. If I was one of those potatoes I’d peel myself for him,” he adds with a wink.

The room suddenly feels several degrees warmer and Blaine lets out a startled laugh.

Kurt rolls his eyes “Elliott, geez. Just show him what to do. You’re not supposed to eat him,” he chides

“Okay okay,” Elliott surrenders, raising his hands.

He throws an arm around Blaine’s shoulder, pulling him close.

“I’m sure we’ll be buds soon, nothing says bonding like peeling several pounds of potatoes together,” he announces happily. “Right, Blaine?”

“Sounds good,” Blaine agrees, grinning, since Kurt doesn’t look really convinced, as if he’s honestly worried Elliott is going to eat Blaine, but he eventually relents.

“All right, I’ll be in the front if you need me.”

He disappears and Blaine tells to Elliott. “So what do we do?”

Elliott hands Blaine an apron and utensils, then drags him to a truly gigantic pot filled with potatoes.

“Actually we only have to peel these. These guys are gonna cook the soup, we’re just the laborers,” he says, pointing to the men at the other end of the kitchen aisle. “Not much to do today.”

“Oh,” Blaine says. “I thought you needed any volunteer you could get.”

“Nah, we’re usually fine. I think Kurt just wanted to get you out of your shell a little.”

They work in silence for a while, although Blaine can feel Elliott throwing him curious glances every now and then.

Thankfully he takes the initiative after a few minutes before Blaine can embarrass himself.

“You play guitar?”

Blaine almost slips on the slick potato with his knife.

“How did you know?” He doesn’t remember talking to Kurt about it so he couldn’t have been the one to tell Elliott.

“The nails on your left hand are shorter,” Elliott explains, pointing to Blaine’s hands. He instinctively looks down, and really. The difference is marginal, but an easy indicator for someone who knows what he’s talking about.

“Good eye,” Blaine compliments, smiling. “I don’t play a lot, though, or very well for that matter.”

Elliott raises an eyebrow. “I don’t believe that.”

Blaine shrugs. “I’ve only played more recently since my family moved and I haven’t had the time or space to set up my keyboard. I’m more a piano kind of guy,” he explains.

“So you’re into music?”

Now that is a topic Blaine can talk about.

“Yeah. Like I said, I play piano and occasionally guitar, and I was in my old school’s a cappella choir. Their lead singer, actually.” He has the right to be proud and show off a little. The Warblers are probably what he misses the most about Dalton.

“Wow.” Elliott sounds genuinely impressed. “I go to a capella gigs sometimes. It can be pretty awesome, my ex got me into it, she was like obsessed with Pentatonix,” he laughs.

Blaine pauses at the pronoun - did he just imagine Elliott flirting with him? He’s about to say something when it dawns on him.

“I’m bi,” Elliott explains good-naturedly, and Blaine blushes at being caught.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed…”

“It’s fine, really. I’m used to it.”

“You shouldn’t be.” Even though Blaine is currently reaping the “benefits” of people making (or not making) assumptions about his sexuality, he’s still not a fan of it.

Elliott reassures him that he’s not offended though, so Blaine lets it slide.

“So what about you?” Elliott prompts after an awkward pause. “Your reputation precedes you, but I love getting to know people myself.”

“Kurt told you about me?” Blaine guesses. He tries not to let the idea get to his head, it’s not like that would mean anything special.

“Well, he mentioned I’d be getting an assistant today, but actually Andy told me there was some fresh meat at Q&A.” He bumps his hips into Blaine’s teasingly.

“So tell me about yourself. Who’s behind the mysterious music-loving Blaine Anderson?”

“Oh. Uhm, I’m gay, but I don’t have a boyfriend. Actually, I’ve never had one,” he confesses. He shouldn’t be embarrassed about it, but friendly as he is Elliott does seem a little intimidating and definitely experienced.

Elliott doesn’t seem to mind, however. “How come?”

“I’ve never met anyone at my old school and I only moved here recently, plus I’m kind of not out at my new school? So that would be weird I guess,” he reasons. The reminder dampens his mood and he turns away from Elliott, focusing on his potatoes.

“I’m sorry, man. That sucks.”

Blaine shrugs, grabbing another potato from the pot while Elliott starts washing his hands. “Look, if you ever need anything… anyone in Q&A will be happy to help. We’re like a big family, and we always have each other’s backs.”

Blaine nods.

“I’ll give you my number, okay? Just call me or text me, whenever you wanna talk or just hang out, all right?” He pulls out an old receipt from his pocket and starts scribbling. Blaine finishes off the potato and cleans up as well to take the paper Elliott hands him.

“Thank you,” he says sincerely. “That means a lot.”

“No, problem.” Blaine folds the paper carefully and tucks it into his wallet. Maybe he’ll actually use it. Elliott is nice and he seems to like him. They move on to lighter topics, and chatting together the time passes quickly, so they’re finished faster than Blaine thought. They dice up the potatoes before handing them over to the chefs who praise them for their quick work.

Blaine and Elliott wash up, folding the aprons, to put them back in the shelf.

“Look, we’re done here for today and I gotta run,” Elliott says. “Do you want a ride, or do you wanna wait around until Kurt is done?”

Blaine considers a little, but he opts for staying here.

“Thank you, but I think I’ll wait? I don’t really have anything to do, so I might as well…” He gestures around the kitchen. “Also I talked to my guidance counselor and she said I can make it count towards community hours, so…”

“Got it,” Elliott grins. “Anyway, it was really great meeting you Blaine! I hope to see you around some more.”

Blaine blushes, ducking his head. “You too, Elliott. Have a nice day.”

“Such a gentleman,” Elliott grins, gathering his stuff. “Bye!” He waves at him, before sauntering out of the kitchen, heavy boots clicking on the floor.

“Bye,” Blaine calls after him, unsure if he’d even still heard it. He stands there for a moment, trying to process what just happened. Elliott is different from anyone he’s met but then again, so is everyone he’s met through Q&A so far. But Elliott had flirted with him, which is definitely a first. It’s something he could get used to.

 

**

 

He’s still smiling when he enters the lunchroom, where a few people are preparing for the oncoming crowd. Kurt catches his smile and returns it.

“You having fun?,” he asks.

“Yeah. Elliott’s a great guy.” Blaine blushes, feeling guilty for telling Kurt this, although he has no reason to. Kurt doesn’t seem phased, though.

Kurt stacks plates next to the cooktop for the soup bowl, glancing at Blaine.

“Did you need anything?”

Only then Blaine remembers he’s not supposed to be here anymore, as his shift is in the kitchen and they’re finished already.

“Uhm, we’re done and Elliott left, but I wanted to see if I can help with anything else.”

“Oh,” Kurt says, his smile broadening. “I think we’re done with preparations so far, but another helping hand is always good, so everyone gets their food faster.”

 

**

 

Once the people arrive they don’t actually have a lot of time to talk. Blaine has a lot of fun meeting people, though, everyone is very friendly and grateful, thanking him sincerely when he hands them a bowl of soup and some bread.

It also makes Blaine remember how lucky he is, how much of a privilege having a plate of food on your table every night and a roof over your head is.

Time flies by once more and by the time they are finished, Blaine feels exhausted but also thrilled with the feeling of having done something good.

Kurt is not responsible for cleaning and closing up so they are allowed to leave once everyone is fed. Blaine follows Kurt to his car, so he can drive him to his Volvo, which is still parked at school.

“Do you maybe want to get a coffee together?” Kurt asks as he pulls out of the parking space.

“Now?” Blaine asks, surprised.

“Yeah. There’s this coffee shop, it’s actually on the way to your school, and I could really use one. I’m kind of an addict,” he admits with a self-conscious smile. “I can take you to your car and get one after, though, if you’d rather get home.”

“No, coffee sounds good,” Blaine assures him. “And I’m kind of an addict, too, so don’t worry.”

“Well, then…” Kurt grins, as he speeds up on the main street.

Blaine tries to remember where Kurt is going. Lima is not a very big city, but he’s still finding his way around.

The coffee shop Kurt takes him too has a tacky but cute name - The Lima Bean.

They get their orders - Kurt insisting on paying for Blaine - and then find a cozy table at the window.

“So did you like today?” Kurt asks, taking a sip of his coffee.

“Oh yeah! I’ve never done anything like this, it was really fun. I like feeling like I’m doing something useful.”

“I’m glad you liked it,” Kurt tells him. He hesitates, before continuing. “You looked a little… tense when I picked you up after school.”

Blaine lowers his eyes, choosing to stare at his cup. He had a feeling Kurt just didn’t invite him out for coffee on a whim.

“Look, you don’t have to talk about it. I just think that maybe you should. Not necessarily to me, but…”

Blaine doesn’t know what to say, so he just turns the warm mug in his hands, avoiding Kurt’s eyes.

“Are you having trouble in school? Are you getting bullied?”

He can’t help but snort at that, finally meeting Kurt’s eyes. Kurt just looks at him confusedly, so he clears his throat.

“Uh, I’m kind of working really hard to avoid that.”

Kurt furrows his brows, waiting for Blaine to elaborate. He hates that he instinctively looks around to check if there’s anyone from school he knows.

“I’m not exactly… out?” he says as quietly as possible.

“Oh.”

“It’s not like I don’t _want_ to be, it’s just, I can’t,” he tries to explain.

Kurt nods empathically. “Your parents?,” he guesses.

Blaine realises how what he said sounds to someone that doesn’t know his full story and shakes his head.

“No, it’s - a bit more complicated.” He takes a sip of coffee, letting the bitter taste ground him. It’s been so long since he talked about all of this. Kurt waits patiently for him to continue.

“Technically I’m out. I was out to my friends at my old school, I’m out to my parents - who are mostly cool with it, my brother, just not here.”

“Okay,” Kurt says slowly. “Is there a particular reason for that?”

“I didn’t start high school at Dalton. I went to another public school before that.” He pauses, trying to stay objective. “In middle school I was mostly figuring myself out. I came out to my family in the summer before my freshman year of high school, and I wanted to start a new life there, be proud and upfront about who I am, you know?”

Kurt nods understandingly, and Blaine continues. “Well the people in that high school weren’t so keen on that.” He takes a breath, trying to block out the memory of angry fists colliding with his aching body. “I got bullied, a lot, and the faculty refused to do anything about it. At one point another gay kid and I ended up in the hospital because we dared to go the Sadie Hawkins dance together.”

His voice wavers at the last part, anger bubbling up in his chest. He had never understood how it was okay for adults to tell a fourteen year-old boy that he had to deal with physical harassment on his own, and that they couldn’t help him, because being gay was his problem, so _man up and deal with it_.

When he looks up Kurt’s eyes are sad but his jaw is clenched in anger.

“I’m really sorry. I was bullied too, but thank god it never got that bad,” he says and Blaine nods shortly in thanks. It’s obvious that Kurt means it, and it’s really touching that he’s angry about something that doesn’t directly affect him.

“I just can’t go through that again,” Blaine says weakly after a pause.

“Can I ask about the school you transferred to after that? I mean, I assume you went there after the incident.”

Blaine nods. “I started at Dalton, yeah. It’s a private school, and it has a zero tolerance policy against bullying. It took me a while to trust them, but eventually I became friends with the guys in the show choir there. I was just another guy to them.”

“I see why you’re sad to leave that behind.” Kurt takes another sip of his coffee, and Blaine follows suit.

“And now I feel like I’m not being myself and lying to people, even though I hate lying, and I want to be proud of who I am but every time people start talking about their girlfriends and ask if I’m seeing anyone I just think of that night at the dance and I get scared!” Blaine lets out a frustrated noise. His chest is heaving slightly but it also feels somehow lighter. Kurt was right about talking about it, and Blaine wonders if he was speaking from experience.

They fall back to silence, Blaine staring at his paper cup morosely while Kurt watches him thoughtfully.

Kurt is the first to break the silence. “You said people talk about their girlfriends - have you made any friends?”

Blaine shrugs. “I joined a club, because I had to start somewhere. There’s this guy in my extracurricular, who I also have some classes with. We get along.”

“What club did you join?”

Blaine blushes a little. “Uh, the Superhero Sidekick Appreciation Club.”

Kurt laughs. “Okay, I definitely wasn’t in that one. But what I wanted to say is - clubs are where I found support. I only came out in my Sophomore year, and I never would have if it wasn’t for the friends I’d made in glee club.”

This catches Blaine’s interest. “There’s a glee club?”

“Yeah,” Kurt says fondly. “There was tons of drama but it all got us closer together. I’m still in contact with most of them, some are my best friends. Do you remember Rachel from the party? She was in it too. I love her, even though I had to fight her for solos every week.”

Blaine smiles at the borrowed memory. “I love performing,” he tells Kurt. “I didn’t know you had a show choir as well.”

Kurt’s expression darkens a little. “Just one thing - you’re definitely gonna get accepted there, but, and even though it got a lot better over the years, if you join there’s the chance people will label you as gay.”

The excitement building up in Blaine is suddenly gone, burst like a bubble, and his face falls.

Kurt scoots forward in his chair.

“If you want to join, do it, though. You can’t let bullies decide what you do with your life.”

“You said you got bullied in high school,” Blaine reminds him. “That doesn’t exactly sound encouraging.”

“Okay, for one I’m always badmouthing high school, and honestly most of the bullying was more… personal,” Kurt says delicately. Blaine raises an eyebrow but Kurt doesn’t elaborate. “It’s a long story,” he dismisses. “And not really my place to tell it, but it’s clear that you’re unhappy with the situation.

“I can’t promise you that there will be no teasing or homophobic idiots, but I think that if you have friends there you can trust, you’ll be a lot happier than eating yourself up every day, pretending to be someone you are not,” Kurt tells him resolutely.

“I know that I’m probably overreacting,” Blaine replies. “But Dalton was like this safe haven that I got kicked out of all of a sudden and now I’m not sure what to do.”

“No, I get why you’re worried and you don’t have to justify it. Just please consider it, okay? Feel out that guy some more, if he seems okay, tell him first. Or if you want to there’s also professional counselors Q&A can refer you to, they will go through the process with you, and can probably give you better advice than I can.”

Blaine smiles gratefully. “Your advice is great, Kurt,” he assures. “I miss performing, so glee club might be a good idea.”

“And,” he adds, interrupting as Kurt starts to say something. “I promise I’ll tell you if I need something.”

Kurt bursts out in laughter. “Oh, good you’re a fast learner,” he teases. “Thank you for telling me, though. I’m happy if I could help you in any way.”

“You really did,” Blaine tells him. “I didn’t even realise myself how badly I needed to talk about this.”

“That’s what friends are for.”

“Well then let me say that I definitely like being your friend,” Blaine says, raising his half-emptied cup to touch it with Kurt’s.

 

**

 

Blaine quickly makes up his mind about joining glee club. He misses singing a lot and Kurt had promised him that he’d find good friends there. Plus, participating in a competitive choir probably looks better on his resume than discussing how criminally undervalued superhero sidekicks are.

Finding the courage to audition is a whole different level. He chickens out a few times showing up for one of their rehearsals and spends hours browsing sheet music to figure out the perfect audition song.

He considers just asking the choir teacher before realising he doesn’t even know who teaches the choir at McKinley. Or if they even have one, maybe the students lead the choir themselves, like at Dalton.

That problem solves itself when he overhears a brunette girl from his history class talk to their teacher before class, excusing herself from today’s glee club meeting.

Blaine eyes her curiously. He hasn’t talked to her, but he knows her name is Marley. She doesn’t talk much but actively participates in class and she always smiles at Blaine when he comes into the classroom. She seems nice.

He decides to linger after Mr Schuester dismisses the class, pretending to sort his notes while the students file out of the room, chattering happily. To his embarrassment, his teacher seems to catch on.

“Is there anything you need, Blaine?” he asks when Blaine finally shoulders his bag, the room empty now. He’s a friendly teacher, committed, knows all the students’ names and the way he talks to them almost borders on fatherly sometimes.

Blaine throws a nervous glance at the open door, then walks over to the teacher’s desk.

“You teach the glee club here, right?”

Mr Schuester looks surprised, but pleasantly so. It’s clear he’s passionate about the club.

“That’s right,” he says.

“Uhm, I was just wondering if there was the possibility of me auditioning? I know you’re in the middle of the competing season and it’s not fair for me to join in just like that, but I’m a mid-year transfer and since it’s my last year, but I’ve been an active member of the glee club at my previous school, I can show you my participation certificates and obviously I’ve prepared several audition pieces if you’d like to see them, I can come whenever you’d-”

“Blaine.” Mr Schuester interrupts him, putting a hand on his shoulder.

Blaine stops his rambling, biting his lip. Did he overstep?

“You’re welcome to join,” his teacher tells him with a smile and Blaine lets out a breath of relief.

“In fact, we’re looking for a member since one of our students left school and we need twelve people to participate at Regionals. If you’d like to audition you’re welcome to, but I’m sure that won’t be necessary if you have experience with show choir.”

“Oh, okay.” Blaine’s shoulders sag in relief. He hesitates, before asking. “Could I still audition, though? I think it would be fair to the others.”

“Sure,” Mr Schuester agrees. “You said you already prepared something?”

Blaine nods.

“Well how would you like coming in tomorrow morning before class? We have a meeting then and you can rehearse this afternoon if you want.”

“That sounds great,” Blaine says with a smile. Some early students start coming into the classroom for their history class, so Blaine adjusts the strap of his bag, getting ready to leave.

“I should probably get to class, but thank you so much!”

“Not a problem, Blaine,” the teacher says with a warm smile. “See you tomorrow.”

 

**

 

Blaine spends the rest of his classes today weighing the pros and cons of the songs in his repertoire. Should he do something current to show he’s up to date or go with a classic to show them he’s familiar with the history of music? He could do a showtune or a rock song, something slow and romantic or happy and upbeat.

He mentally flips through his extensive music library, trying to come up with the perfect song. Even if Mr. Schuester had said his experience would suffice to get him in, he wants to make a good impression on his new potential friends.

When he comes across a picture of mars in his astrology book it suddenly hits him.

The song is perfect - a classic, upbeat but theatrical enough to prove that he can belt out a showtune as well.

He smiles to himself as he relaxes into his seat to focus on the rest of his class.

 

**

 

Although he knows he can work this song in his sleep, Blaine can’t help but being a little nervous. He leaves for school early and is relieved to find the choir room unlocked. He sets down his bag before sitting down at the beautiful black piano, gently resting his fingers on the keys **.**

He goes through the chords, making sure he remembers them, when there’s suddenly a hand on his shoulder, causing him to jump.

“Blaine?”

He freezes when he realises Sam is standing behind him.

“Uhm, hi **.”**

 **“** What are you doing here?” Sam is smiling brightly, as if finding Blaine in the choir room is the best thing that has happened to him all week.

“Oh, I just wanted…” he starts explaining, but Sam interrupts him.

“Wait, are you the one trying out for glee club?”

“H-how did you know that?”

“Mr Schue told us someone would come to audition today before class,” Sam says casually. “I just didn’t know it was you, why didn’t you tell me?”

Suddenly it dawns on Blaine. “Wait, _you’re_ in glee club?”

“Sure.” Sam shrugs. “I’m sure I mentioned that.”

Blaine is positive that he did not, because he definitely would have remembered that, but he doesn’t correct Sam as his friend sits down on one of the chairs at the back of the room, digging out his phone.

“That’s cool though, we can hang out together even more.”

Before Blaine has the chance to reply a group of students comes into the room, chatting with each other. He smiles as they eye him curiously.

He recognizes Marley from his history class and Unique who sits next to her. Jake and Ryder are in his gym class and he’s definitely seen the boy in the wheelchair around.

A few others that he doesn’t remember seeing before join in after a while, heading to the back of the room.

Blaine feels awkward alone in the front, although he loves performing, he kind of got used to not being in the center of attention around here. He’s glad when Mr. Schuester strides in, wishing them all a good morning.

“So as I said today a new member will join us. Blaine approached me after class, and I’m sure he’ll be a great help for us to get through Regionals. He would like to show you what he’s got, so I’m just gonna leave the floor to him now.”

He gives Blaine a friendly clap on the shoulder, then joins his students on the seats.

The tall blonde in the back row leans over to the Asian girl next to her, whispering loudly, “What’s wrong with his hair?” She just shushes her, rolling her eyes, but Blaine self-consciously smoothes a hand over the back of his head.

He clears his throat, sitting up straighter on the piano bench.

“Hey guys. My name is Blaine Anderson and I’m a senior. I transferred here a few weeks ago and I wanted to join a few clubs to meet more people. I’ve done show choir for about two years and I really hope we can become a good team to go all the way to nationals.”

He’s met with silence, so he decides to wrap it up.

“I’m gonna perform one of my favourite songs for you, ‘Don’t Stop Me Now’ by Queen.

“ _Nice_ ,” the boy in the wheelchair comments, with a grin, which Blaine returns.

“Take it away Blaine,” Mr Schuester encourages, and Sam gives him a thumbs up so Blaine turns to the piano and starts playing.

As soon as he begins he knows the song is perfect. He’s familiar with the tune and the energetic feeling of the song helps him go all the way through.

He gets momentarily distracted as the others start clapping and singing along, but he lets their enthusiasm drive him, finishing off the song grinning happily.

Once the last note fades he’s met with whoops and cheers, so he stands up, bowing his head a little.

“I really hope you’re not gonna tell him you need to consider it,” the Asian girl from before admonishes Mr Schuester.

“That was amazing!” Marley says excitedly.

“You’re really good, man,” Jake agrees and Blaine smiles at them bashfully.

“Of course Blaine is joining us. I already told him he can, but he wanted to give you the chance to see him perform.” Mr Schuester says, smiling. “That was fantastic Blaine, thank you.”

Suddenly Blaine is swarmed by the glee club, Sam throwing an arm around him and introducing him to everyone.

“Ah, hell no,” Unique says when he tries to shake her hand. “We’re history buddies, come on.” She wraps him up in a tight hug that he returns hesitantly.

The boy in the wheelchair is called Artie and ensures Blaine that if he ever needs something from the AV club he’ll hook him up. The cheerleader who commented on his hair earlier introduces herself as Britney Spears but since the others are calling her Britt, he thinks she really might not be joking.

Tina, the girl she was talking to before, puts him out of his misery when she quickly explains that the tall cheerleader is called Brittany Susan Pierce and Blaine is not to take her seriously.

He’s also introduced to Kitty, who’s petite but looks like she could snap his neck within a second.

The last boy waits patiently until the others have stopped occupying Blaine and shakes his hand courteously as he introduces himself as Joe.

Although they are all lovely and welcoming Blaine is relieved when the bell announces the first lesson of the day. Meeting so many people at once is overwhelming, especially since none of them are very reserved about their introductions and questions.

 

**

 

Before he can get in line at lunch, Tina appears at his side and announces that he will eat with them. She uses their waiting time trying to get Blaine more familiar with the club (apparently they’re still not very popular, like Kurt said) and tells him all about who dated who in the New Directions (which is a horrifyingly long list Blaine can’t imagine memorizing).

She’s nice though, and Blaine finds himself relaxing next to her. Lunch with the New Directions is the most fun he’s had so far at this school and although he doesn’t really know them yet he can see why Kurt spoke so highly of them.

When he heads back to class later, he sends off a text to Kurt:

_Auditioned for glee this morning, went really well! Everyone is super nice! :)_

Kurt replies not long later, wishing him good luck with glee club and telling him he’s glad Blaine shrugged off his qualms.

The positive energy from his new teammates rubs off on him and lasts the entire day and Blaine realises how much he missed being with people.

He kisses his mother on the cheek when he gets home and fixes them both a cup of coffee, wincing slightly at the astonished look on her face. He must have been more withdrawn than he realised.

She doesn’t ask about it though, so he starts on his homework, staying downstairs for once to keep her company while she starts on dinner.

Later that night, when he’s in his bed in pyjamas, surfing the internet, his phone rings. His stomach flips a little when he sees Elliott’s name on the display. He hasn’t heard from him since the soup kitchen but the fact that Elliott is calling him, out of the blue is kind of exciting.

“Hey Elliott!”

“Hey Blaine, how are you doing?”

“I’m actually doing well. I had a great day at school today, met some new people.”

“That’s fantastic, I’m happy to hear that!”

“Thank you.”

“Listen Blaine,” Elliott says. There’s a rustling noise in the background. “I’m on my way to work so I don’t have a lot of time.”

“What’s going on?” He suddenly realises how much his stomach is tingling with nervosity.

“Do you have plans on Saturday afternoon?”

“Uhm, no, not really,” Blaine replies, clearing his throat. “Why?”

“There’s a concert in Columbus I think you would like, and a bunch of us are going. Do you wanna come?”

“Oh,” Blaine says. “A bunch of you from Q&A?”

“Yeah. You in?”

“Sure. If you say I’m gonna like it I’m gonna hold you to that.”

“Trust, me you will,” Elliott laughs. “Nice. Okay, I gotta run, but I’ll text you the details, ok?”

“Sure. Have fun at work.”

“I’ll try,” Elliott says wryly. “See you on Saturday?”

“Yeah see you then.”

The line goes dead and Blaine’s heart pounds. This is the first time a guy sort of asked him out, even if it’s with other people. But Elliott had thought of him, thought he’d like the concert and decided to ask him along.

Blaine grins as he shuts his laptop closed and starts clearing off the bed. Of course Kurt had asked him to come to the New Year’s party and the soup kitchen but it felt different this time. He wonders if Kurt will come along too, and starts wondering what he’ll wear. He realises that it’s kind of difficult without knowing what kind of concert he’ll go to, but Elliott hasn’t texted yet, so he just calls it a night.

 

**

 

Elliott’s text only comes the next day when he’s at school, trying to force himself not to send a hundred panicked messages.

 

 

> _Sorry hon got totally swamped, work was crazy last night & i’m only half alive._
> 
> _768 E Long Street Columbus 3pm!_

_‘Don’t worry’_ Blaine texts back as if he hadn’t been doing the same thing the last few hours. _‘Hope to see you a little more alive on saturday!’_

 

 

> _‘Nothing a little coffee and a good nap can’t fix ;)’_

With his first glee club meeting ahead of him, the day actually goes by pretty fast.

During the meeting Blaine finds out that the group has a theme each week to which they perform songs. This week’s theme is ‘love’ which is pretty broad but doesn’t have a lot of originality to it, but Blaine is excited to hear some of the voices in glee. Marley and Jake, who are dating apparently, sing a cute ballad and Artie gets a bit inappropriate with ‘ _Addicted to Love_ ’, but Blaine almost forgets everyone else’s performances when Tina gets up and wipes the floor with her rendition of _‘Burn’_ from Hamilton.

When she’s finished she smiles bashfully as if she didn’t just deliver a Broadway-worthy performance, announces that that song was for Mike and his new girlfriend before swiftly taking a seat and smoothing over her dress.

“Uh, who is Mike?” Blaine asks, leaning in to whisper into Sam’s ear while Mr. Schuester gets up to explain something.

“Her ex. He was a year above us and when he went to college he broke up with her because she wasn’t Asian enough or something.”

“What?!” Blaine says horrifiedly.

Sam shrugs. “That’s what we heard. His parents are like super strict Chinese people.”

Blaine still tries to comprehend the things that are happening in glee club when Mr Schuester lets out the meeting, thanking them.

The most drama the Warblers had were debates over competition outfits (as if they had much choice) and whether or not Blaine was fit to sing a certain song. This was definitely gonna take some time to get used to.

 

**

 

Blaine resists the urge to look up what event is taking place at the venue Elliott texted him and decides for a casual polo and pants. He considers adding a bowtie but he doesn’t want to be overdressed so he decides to leave it at that.

Elliott asked him to be there half an hour early so they’d have time to get to their seats. He hasn’t been to this theater before, but there’s a crowd gathered in the front already and he immediately notices that many of them seem to be gay couples. He turns to look at one of the posters next to the entrance and immediately starts smiling. Elliott was right.

 

 

> **Columbus Gay Men’s Chorus Presents:**
> 
> **Rock Out!**

Blaine hadn’t even known there was a gay men’s chorus in Columbus and he’s grinning, giddy with excitement when he hears Elliott shout his name.

“Told you you’d love it,” Elliott says smugly before wrapping Blaine in a hug. Andy is here too, kissing Blaine’s cheeks.

“I’m ashamed to admit I had no idea this was going on,” Blaine says, gesturing to the theater.

Andy looks at him disbelievingly. “You haven’t seen them before?,” they ask disbelievingly and Blaine shakes his head apologetically.

“Boy, you’re missing out on something. Thank god you met us, right Elliott?” They throw an arm around Blaine’s shoulder to drag him inside but Blaine doesn’t miss the smirk on Elliott’s face before he replies “Yeah, thank god.”

Blaine ducks his head and follows the others inside. The group seems to have tickets already but Elliott refuses to let Blaine pay for his.

“it’s our welcome present,” he argues and it doesn’t look like he’s gonna give in so Blaine just thanks him, making a mental note to return the favor somehow.

Only when they take their places Blaine realises with a pang of disappointment that Kurt is not coming. It’s quickly replaced with excitement though, when Elliott hands him the programme for the concert.

“This is so cool,” Blaine comments as he reads through the description of the group.

_Voices Raised, Lives Changed_

_The Columbus Gay Men’s Chorus was formed in 1990 and maintains the vision of its founding members to foster increased recognition, understanding and acceptance of gay men, lesbians, bisexuals and transgender persons._

“Yeah isn’t it?” Elliott says, looking around the already packed theater in awe. “I’m not like a choir person, but I’m gonna join them when I don’t have to work and not fail college at the same time.”

“That would be cool,” Blaine agrees. “I’d love to but it says they only take people from 18 and I wanna go to New York after High School.”

Elliott whistles “New York, huh. Gonna show Broadway what they’re missing out on?”

“Something like that.” Blaine smiles bashfully. “What do you study?” he asks, suddenly realising he doesn’t even really know what Elliott does.

“Photography. I mean I love performing, but sometimes I like being in the background and letting other people - or things - shine.”

Blaine nods. “That makes sense. What year are you in?”

“Oh, I’m only a sophomore. I perform in cafés and such when I’m not on my waiter job, so I get to do everything I love.”

Before they can continue their conversation the lights go down and applause breaks out as about fifty men come onto stage.

The concert is probably the best Blaine has been to and he’s seen Adam Levine perform live. Although not all of the performers are professional singers, the one thing they all do have is joy. Their enthusiasm is engaging and infectious and Blaine finds himself clapping along to most of the songs. Blaine loves classic rock so seeing his favourite songs performed by a group of gay men, of which whom most seem to be in their forties, is an experience he never wants to forget.

Blaine invites Elliott, Andy and the two to coffee later, and they go over their favourite performances and moments. Andy, who seems to be a long-time fan of the group, urges Blaine to look at more of their performances online.

Blaine promises them he’ll go to future concerts with them. Elliott teases him that he’s going to regret that decision and Andy bites back that Elliott is only jealous that Blaine is going to spend time with them and not him. Blaine swears he can see Elliott blush when he tells them to shut up, but he doesn’t say anything, just bites his lips as he laughs at their antics.

 

**

 

Over the next few weeks, lunch with the New Directions becomes a regular occurrence. Before Blaine usually ate with some of the people from his Geography class right before lunch period but all of their conversations were superficial with Blaine desperately avoiding the topic of relationships.

He still doesn’t mention anything with the glee club, but they also don’t seem to care (or suspect, a voice in the back of his head adds, making him feel both ashamed and relieved). He doesn’t feel pressured, they’re open and mostly discussing some kind of drama going on or options for their Regionals setlist. (Which Blaine is shocked to find they haven’t set yet with a little over one month to go till the competition.)

Sam is probably still his favourite, with his hilarious impressions and a liking for superheroes that Blaine shares. But he also likes Tina, and although she’s a bit of a gossip she gives off a motherly vibe and tries to be the voice of reason in the group.

He loves that the girls are outspoken and the guys are openminded and although everyone in the group is completely different they stick together and make him feel included from the first day.

Kurt and he get coffee together often, Blaine updating him on his progress and Kurt telling him more about his life.

So he learns that Kurt had wanted to go to New York for school too but hadn’t gotten accepted in the school of his choice, NYADA.

“Why don’t you try out again?” Blaine asks when Kurt confesses this, but he just shrugs.

“I’m not good enough, that’s not gonna change. I don’t want to be pathetic.”

“It’s not pathetic,” Blaine insists. “You should try out again, it shows you’re determined, and maybe you can even ask what made them not accept you so you can improve on that. Isn’t that what college is about, especially in theater? Learning and getting better?”

Kurt smiles. “I thought I was supposed to be your mentor, not the other way around.”

Blaine rolls his eyes fondly. “You’re my friend. You made me audition for glee club, so I’m gonna make you audition for NYADA. We can apply together.”

Kurt remains silent, twisting his cup in his hands.

“You’re not really happy with the college here, right?”

“It’s not bad…”

“But it’s also not what you want. Promise me that you’ll at least try out again. I’m sure together we can make it. We’ll get an apartment together and take over New York!”

Kurt blushes, avoiding Blaine’s eyes but the smile on his face seems genuine now.

“Deal?”

Blaine’s urging finally makes Kurt look up and he looks determined.

“Deal.”

 

**

 

With all the meet-ups with Q&A and his and Kurt’s preparation for NYADA the weeks go by fast. He gets closer with the New Directions than he has ever gotten with the Warblers, especially with Tina and Sam.

However, it’s not until the beginning of March that he learns how much they all really have his back. He’s at his locker, stuffing all the books he needs for his homework in his bag, trying to hurry up as he had to stay longer after his class and he needs to get to glee club.

“Hey!” Something about the tone in the voice behind him makes his blood run cold. It’s not a friendly hey, or a shy hey to ask a question. It demands his attention.

He closes his locker turns around to face two guys in letterman jackets and one of them has the ugliest haircut Blaine has ever seen. They look anything but friendly and Blaine feels like a deer in headlights unable to move. He takes a shaky breath, trying to stay reasonable.

_There’s people around, you’re in school, it’s day, it won’t happen again, it won’t happen again, it’s not Sadie Hawkins._

“C-can I help you?”

The guy with the ugly haircut looks at his friend, then grins in a way that makes the bile rise up in Blaine.

“We just realised we haven’t properly welcomed you to McKinley.”

Blaine stares at them confusedly, heart pounding in his chest. Sam and Ryder are on the sports team as well, maybe they really just-

Before he can finish the thought, he’s suddenly hit with cold.

It’s on his face, in his eyes and _it burns_.

The icy mush sticks to his lips and it tastes disgustingly sweet - a slushie? and starts trickling down his chest and back.

The thing is in his eyes, so he can’t see when one of the guys pushes him back, the padlock on his locker painfully digging in his shoulder. He stumbles with the force of the shove, landing on his knees and frantically wipes at his eyes to regain some kind of power **.**

He flinches at a slapping noise, but judging by their laughter, the guys just high fived each other.

“Don’t be late for glee club homo!” one of them yells and they miraculously start disappearing without hurting him any further.

“Hey!” Suddenly there’s someone by his side and he recognizes Marley’s voice.

“What the hell dude?” Apparently Jake, too.

“Blaine, are you okay?” Now that most of the slush is out of his eyes he can see her kneeling next to him, a hand on his shoulder and worried expression on her face.

“Cold,” he presses out, trying to get his still racing heart to stop pounding so fast.

“C’mon, we’ll get you cleaned.”

“What’s going on?” Unique is here too now and Blaine wonders how they’re all at the same place until he realises they’re probably all on their way to glee.

“Just go ahead guys, I’ll drive home,” he mumbles.

“What, no.” Unique stares at him like he’s insane, then grabs him by his wrist. “We’re getting you clean and then you’re coming to glee, you’re not letting some idiots chase you away.”

Blaine falls into a stunned silence and lets himself be dragged off to the faculty bathroom. The girls methodically clean off his face while Jake goes to fetch him something to wear and slowly but surely he’s beginning to calm down. He’s okay, he didn’t get hurt (a lot). His hands stop shaking and once he recovers he notices how odd it is that no one seems surprised he just had a slushie dumped over his head.

“Is this normal here?”

Unique laughs bitterly. “It’s how they treat the glee club. You might have noticed we’re not very popular here, and all of us have had the honors before. Although it didn’t happen as much recently, sorry we didn’t tell you.”

“Not your fault,” he says, shrugging. They get most of the slush of but his skin still feels itchy and sticky and he’s still cold so he’s grateful when Jake returns with a sweater. It’s a little large on him and clashes with the color of his pants but it’s better than nothing.

“Do you want to come to glee club?” Marley asks softly. “It’s okay if you want to go home.”

“But I think you shouldn’t,” Jake tells him. “That’s just what they want. And you like glee, right, so it might cheer you up.”

Blaine’s heart squeezes and he blinks away the tears building in his eyes. They’re so supportive, so worried, although he’s not even hurt. The people he’d been friends with since middle school didn’t even bother to visit him in the hospital once. He clears his throat, and forces a smile on his face as he looks at his friends.

“Glee club sounds good.”

Unique grins and Marley giggles happily as she helps him up.

The hallway is empty now and they rush to the choir room uninterrupted. The New Directions are engaged in a heated discussion (probably about solos at Regionals) but fall silence when the four of them walk in.

“What happened?” Mr Schuester asks. “Blaine, are you okay?”

“Blaine just got his first slushie,” Jake explains as they sit down.

Noise breaks out again, everyone giving him their apologies. “I got through it,” he deflects. “Thanks to you guys.” He smiles at his helpers and Unique rolls her eyes. “Of course boo, that’s what we do.”

Tina gets up to sit next to him, putting an a hand on his arm.

“It was some guys from the hockey team,” Marley says irritably. “They’re so stupid. And they’re still not over the dumb ‘everyone in glee is gay’ joke.”

There’s annoyed murmuring and suddenly Blaine feels overcome with affection for this group of people. He knows he doesn’t owe them or anything, but he feels slightly guilty for hiding his true self when everyone here is always so open and honest. And right now he doesn’t see a reason why he shouldn’t do it too, and he trusts them not to let him down. So before he can fall back in his pattern of hiding, he opens his mouth.

“Actually I am,” he interrupts Marley’s rant about the jocks. The whole club looks at him and his mouth starts feeling a little dry but there’s no return now. And for the first time in month he doesn’t want there to be.

“I’m gay,” he says, fighting to keep his voice even. It’s silent for a moment, and his heart rate picks up speed again until Kitty simply says,

“That still doesn’t give them the right to dump cold liquid sugar over you.”

The others agree and the discussion about how stupid the Jocks are picks up again.

“Guys, calm down,” Mr Schuester interrupts them. “Blaine I’m sorry, if you’d like to you can report it to the principal but unfortunately I have to tell you that you might not even be able to get them suspended.” Blaine nods, it’s not like he expected differently from a public school. Schools that defend kids that beat others into the hospital just because they don’t like them there. “As for us,” Mr Schue continues. “We should focus on Regionals. What better way to tell them off than coming home with the first place trophy, huh?”

The room erupts into enthusiastic cheers and that’s it. No comments, no questions, and Blaine’s stomach flips when he realises that they really, actually do not care about his sexuality.

While the others move on back to fighting about who gets to perform a solo Blaine feels all the stress and tension of the past two months leave his body until he feels ready to cry.

He’s slow to gather his stuff after the meeting ends, assuring his friends that he’s fine. When he’s finally alone, he lets out a deep sigh, feeling a tear slide hotly over his cheek.

“Blaine?” He flinches at Tina’s voice.

“Sorry, I forgot my scarf,” she says, pointing to where it’s wrapped on a chair.

“Are you okay?” she asks, retaking her seat next to him.

“I-” he starts, not sure what to tell her.

Tina looks around the room then back to him.

“Was that your first time coming out?” she asks softly, taking his hand.

Blaine shakes his head. “No, well not really…”

Tina is silent, waiting for him to continue. He looks at her and there’s a warm smile on her face as she waits patiently.

“I have my issues with public schools,” he explains. “Before McKinley I went to a private school, and they had a policy against bullying, so I felt safe there.”

Tina’s face twists into a sad look, as if she senses that there is more to the story.

“Before that, I started as a freshman in Westerville South. I came out just the summer before because I wanted to start high school true to who I am.”

She nods understandingly and squeezes his hand.

He takes a deep breath before continuing. “The people there didn’t like that so much. I got teased a lot, and the faculty refused to deal with it and that all might have been tolerable, but….

“A few months in there was a Sadie Hawkins dance. I asked a Junior, the only other gay guy I knew at school if he’d go with me, as friends, and he agreed. We were waiting for his Dad to pick us up, when these guys beat the living crap out of us.”

Tina is silent and looks down at their joined hands. “That’s horrible Blaine. I’m sorry you had to go through this.”

“I guess I was never really able to put it behind me,” he admits. “And when my parents said we were moving and I’d have to go to public school again....”

“You were scared,” Tina finishes for him. “That’s totally understandable.”

“I hated it though,” Blaine continues, suddenly angry. If at himself for being a coward, or those jocks for hurting him and never getting punished at all, he’s not sure.

“I hate being in the closet, I want to be proud of who I am, and I am, you know? I even joined this LGBT* club in Columbus, and I love it there.”

“But you don’t have to hide yourself,” Tina tells him. “At least not in this room.”

“I know.” Suddenly Blaine remembers that Kurt actually was here too. He always thought about Kurt being in glee club so abstractly that it never occurred to him that he might know everyone in the group.

“Actually I auditioned because someone in the club told me about New Directions.”

Tina raises her eyebrows. “Really, who?”

“Kurt Hummel?”

“No freaking way!”

Blaine laughs. “You know him?”

“Of course I do! I can’t believe you know Kurt Hummel. That jerk never calls or anything. How is he doing?”

“Good, I think,” Blaine grins. “This is so weird.”

“It’s sad that you missed him. He’s an amazing performer. And you two would make the cutest couple.”

“Oh my god!” Blaine blushes.

“Come on, you have to admit he’s cute!” He looks at Tina before they both burst out into laughter.

“You should ask him out,” Tina tells him sincerely. “You’re a catch.”

“Thank you, but I don’t think that’s how he sees me.”

Tina shrugs. “Your call. Hey I gotta go, my mom wants me home… are you gonna be okay? I could ask her if you can come over.”

Blaine’s heart warms at the gesture and he wonders what he did to deserve someone like Tina. “It’s okay. I have to get home too, anyway.”

“If you’re sure?” They get up, Tina grabbing her scarf and Blaine gathering the rest of his stuff.

“Yeah. Thank you, it really helped getting it off my chest.”

“No problem,” she smiles.

“It was just kind of overwhelming, the slushie and then no one reacting when I said I’m gay, as if all I confessed was that I like popcorn,” he says as they walk down the hallway to the exit.

Tina laughs. “You know, I think something like that actually would cause more drama in glee.”

 

**

 

Blaine is on dinner duty today, so he doesn’t really have time to reflect until later that night. By the time he’s out of the shower he’s exhausted but at the same time restless and full of energy. He feels silly for taking so long to trust the New Directions, it was the same with the Warblers and Kurt had promised him it would be a safe space.

The thought of Kurt makes him smile, if it wasn’t for him he’d probably still lie his way through questions of girlfriends and only hang out with the Superhero Sidekick Appreciation Club.

He checks the clock on his nightstand, it’s only past eight so not too late to call. He bites his lips for a moment before pulling up Kurt’s contact on his phone and dialling. Kurt would want to hear this.

“Blaine?”

“Hey, Kurt.” He settles on his bed, making himself comfortable.

“What’s up?”

“Can I talk to you for a minute?”

Kurt seems to sense that it’s something important, because he tells Blaine to wait a minute while he goes somewhere more private. Not for the first time Blaine wonders if he’s just that easy to read or if Kurt is good at reading people in general.

“Sorry, it’s quieter now. Don’t need my dad to listen into all of my conversations,” he jokes. “Although now he probably thinks I’m talking to my secret lover.”

Blaine blushes at the thought and at the other end of the line he can hear Kurt clear his throat.

“Anyway, you wanted to tell me something?”

Blaine remembers the reason for his call, shaking his head to clear his thoughts.

“Yes, so today was an interesting day at school.”

“What happened?”

“Some jocks dumped a slushie over my head. Which apparently is a thing at this school?”

“Oh gosh. I’m so sorry, the slushies are definitely among the long list of things I don’t miss. Are you ok?”

“Yeah, yeah. It was after class, I was about to leave for glee and some of my friends helped me. It was just... cold. And at first I thought they were going to do something else…”

“Oh honey. I’m so happy your friends were there for you, though. Now you’re officially a member of the New Directions, I guess.”

“Yeah,” Blaine says smiling. “They’re all really great. Which is why -” he takes a breath, as if saying out loud would make it more true. “Why I told them. About me. That I’m gay.”

“Really? Blaine that’s amazing!” Blaine can’t help but grin at that, hiding his face in his free hand. “How did they react?”

“That’s the thing, they didn’t.” He plucks at the hem of his pyjama pants. “It’s not like I expected them to kick me out, one of them is transgender, but…”

“But your brain still tells you that they’re going to find you weird like the others did before,” Kurt supplies knowingly.

“Yeah. I feel kind of ungrateful for that, they never gave me a reason not to trust them.”

“Your trust has been broken before, it’s natural to be wary. Enough about you unnecessarily beating yourself up about your completely valid concerns. How do you feel?”

“Free?” Blaine’s not sure why he formulates it as a question. “Like I’ve been trapped in a cage these past months or even years because Dalton still felt like hiding like a coward and now I can finally go out there and be _myself_ again. It’s very… liberating. Although I’m a bit nervous about going to school tomorrow,” he admits.

“I can see why but I’d try not to worry too much. It was your choice, you have the upper hand here, and a group of people who have your back.”

“And you,” Blaine reminds him and Kurt laughs.

“And me of course.”

“No, seriously Kurt, I could have never done this without you, I-” he chokes, suddenly overwhelmed with emotions.

“Sh, it’s okay. You’re a special person Blaine, you deserve to be happy. And I could tell that you weren’t when we first met in Columbus. I’m glad I could help you, but _you_ did all of the work. You were the one to fight your demons and overcome your fears and I’m so proud of you.”

Blaine lets out a quiet sob at that, unable to hold back the tears that had been building ever since he admitted he’s gay in front of his friends five hours ago.

“Thank you,” he says, taking a shaky breath. “I thought I’d spend the rest of my high school career in the closet, hating myself.”

“But you’re not, and that’s amazing!” Kurt reminds him gently. “Do you want to go for a celebratory coffee on Saturday before going to Q&A?”

Baine wipes his face with the back of his hand, taking a deep breath.

“That sounds good. When do you want me to pick you up?”

 

**

 

As predicted, Blaine can’t shake the nervosity that overcomes him the next day before school. He only told a room full of people he considers his friends that he’s gay yesterday afternoon but rumours spread fast in this school. He tries to remember what Kurt told him, that he is the strong one for doing this and so he actually starts feeling empowered.

He’s more skittish than usual that day, flinching at every slam of a locker door, keeping his eyes open for any sign of a slushie.

There are some looks, some whispers and he hears the word gay muttered more often than he can count. But no one approaches him, no one shoves him into lockers or tells him to stop rubbing his gayness in their faces.

The looks make him feel exposed and vulnerable, but he holds his head high. He doesn’t have to hide anymore, he’s proud of who he is and it’s just silly high school gossip. No one is hurting him.

Although it gets better over the duration of the day, Blaine is fidgety, so he nearly jumps out of his skin when Sam surprises him at his locker before lunch.

“Dude, you gotta come to the auditorium!”

“What?” Blaine says confusedly, pressing a hand over his racing heart.

“It’s an emergency!” Sam shouts before taking off so Blaine has no choice but to follow him.

He loses Sam on his way and when he arrives at the auditorium it’s empty and barely lit. A few of the jazz band members are gathered in the corner of the stage with their instruments and Tina is standing in the middle.

“What’s going on?” Blaine calls out to her.

“Sit down,” she instructs, gesturing to the seats in the front row. Blaine does as he’s told, slowly taking the steps toward the ground floor.

“We have something to say to you,” Tina explains once he’s seated.

“We?” The auditorium seems empty except for Tina and the band but he guesses Sam is around somewhere.

“Just sit back and listen,” she says with a smile before turning to the band and nodding once.

A soft piano intro starts playing and Blaine smiles when he recognizes the song by A Great Big World as Tina starts singing.

 

 

 

> _You’ll be okay_
> 
> _You’ll be okay_
> 
> _The sun will rise_
> 
> _To better days_
> 
>  

Sam steps on the stage as Tina finishes the first verse to take over, and so all of the New Directions come out one by one, each with a solo in the song dedicated to him.

The performance is stripped down, just the soloist in the front delivering their lines as if directly talking to him, while the others start building a half circle.

When Tina drags him onto stage towards the end of the song, tears start springing to his eyes. They’re all singing in a chorus now, and every word feels like a warm hug, a supportive arm, a shoulder to cry on and Blaine knows with all his heart that they mean it.

 

**

 

He tells Kurt about it on Saturday over coffee, unable to stop smiling.

“That definitely sounds like them,” Kurt comments after Blaine is finished with his story. “I don’t miss high school, but I definitely miss having these wonderfully crazy people around me all the time.”

“You should stop by sometime. Tina said they never even hear from you.”

Kurt sighs. “Yeah I know I’ve been slacking. You hang out with Tina a lot?”

“Yeah,” Blaine nods. “She’s one of the best friends I’ve made so far at school. She’s really awesome.”

“That she is. I hope she’s finally getting her chance to shine.”

Blaine raises an eyebrow questioningly but Kurt shakes his head. “It’s a long complicated story with lots of drama. But I can see why she likes you,” he says in a tone that makes the colour rise high in Blaine’s cheeks.

“Should we get going?” he suggests, finishing off his coffee.

Kurt agrees, so they gather their jackets, ready to leave. It’s Blaine’s turn to drive this time; they’ve gotten in the habit of sharing cars whenever they go to Q&A the same day.

When they arrive Blaine reminisces about the first time he went there, nervous what people would think about him, dreading the inevitable final months of high school crammed into the closet and hating himself.

Now, months later, he’s out and proud again, has the best friends anyone could think of.

The news that Blaine overcame his fears quickly spreads and everyone, even people he’s never met before congratulate him. Apparently it’s not the only good news though; Olive, who Blaine only met briefly while hanging out at the apartment, announces that she finally got her first dose of hormones and has officially started her transition.

The mood is even lighter than usual and Blaine feels light and carefree, laughing through a game of scrabble with Andy and Kurt.

Kurt wins miles ahead, and Blaine, who usually hates losing, can’t let himself be bothered by it.

Elliott arrives just as they finish the game, taking the seat on the couch Kurt leaves next to Blaine as he gets up for a drink.

“Heard you showed your school how awesome you really are,” he says in lieu of greeting, a broad grin splitting his face.

Blaine returns the smile. “Yeah, I guess all the worrying was without reason.”

“Nonsense. I’m proud of you.” Elliott pats his knee and Blaine blushes at the gesture.

“Thank you. I’m really glad I did it. I’m not made for being in the closet.”

“We should celebrate,” Elliott says suddenly, lowering his voice.

“Aren’t we?” Blaine looks around the room, everyone is standing or sitting in groups, laughing.

Elliott rolls his eyes. “I mean like really celebrate,” he says. “Get some food or something.”

“Oh, sure. Who do you want to invite?”

Elliott clears his throat, scooting closer to Blaine. “Actually I thought, maybe just us two this time?” He raises his eyebrows, hopeful look on his face and Blaine can feel himself turn crimson and his heart rate starts doubling its speed.

Is Elliott asking him out on a date?

He’s not stupid, he knows Elliott had been flirting with him, and he had flirted back sometimes, but he never thought about going out with Elliott. He’s not even sure what he thought, maybe he assumed Elliott was flirty with everyone, but thinking about it he knows it’s not true. His stomach flips at the realisation that a very attractive guy he likes just asked him out on a date.

“That- that would be lovely,” he manages and the smile that spreads even further on Elliott’s face makes his stomach flip again.

“Great! I’ll think of somewhere nice to take you,” he promises and Blaine huffs out a bashful laugh.

“You have Regionals next week, right?”

“Yeah. We’ll probably be drowning in rehearsal next week,” he realises sadly.

“Don’t worry, we can go afterward? Then we’ll have even more to celebrate.” Elliott looks triumphant and Blaine laughs.

“Or you’ll have to cheer me up.”

“I’m sure that won’t be the case but I have no problem with that.” He teasingly nudges Blaine’s shoulder with his own. “And now you gotta tell me all about how you showed these asses where to stick their homophobia.”

 

**

 

As predicted, Blaine barely sees anything other than the choir room the following week. They use all the time they have before and after classes to rehearse, perfecting their numbers and they only decide on what they’re going to perform the Monday before the competition which is kind of a breakneck attitude if you ask Blaine.

But he knows that together they can do it. Marley had revealed her penchant for songwriting and after a little convincing Mr Schuester agreed to let them perform one of those instead of the numbers he suggested, which were good but just outdated. Apparently the New Directions had a history with self-written songs and when Tina and Artie start singing a song called Trouty Mouth that appears to be about Sam Blaine wishes he’d come to this school earlier. He loves and misses Dalton but he’s started realising more and more how closed off he had lived there.

He even gets to sing the song Marley wrote with her; it’s about seizing opportunities and laying everything on the line to be happy, something Blaine can relate to closely.

For their performance, the boys open up with _Hall of Fame_ and afterwards the girls bring the house down with their rendition of _I Love It_ , until Blaine and Marley round up the setlist with her ballad _All Or Nothing_. Blaine loves performing again and he enjoys every second on stage, basking in the attention and applause as he sings his heart out to Marley and the audience.

Their performance is solid, every step in place and every note hit but still with enough heart to seem charming instead of robotic and rehearsed. Competition is tough however, so Blaine clutches Tina’s hand nervously when the ranking is announced.

_“And the winners of the 2016 Greater Midwest Regional Show Choir Championship and moving on to the finals in Boston are…”_

The room goes so quiet you could hear a penny drop, as if everyone is holding their breath at the same time. Blaine squeezes Tina’s hand, his eyes shut closed.

_“The New Directions!”_

Cheers erupt at a deafening volume and Blaine lets out a huge sigh of relief. Sam shakes him by the shoulders, shouting into his ear and suddenly Blaine shouts too, letting himself be dragged to the center of the stage to take their bows.

Tina has tears in her eyes when Artie accepts the trophy and Marley definitely is crying as Unique spins her around the stage. Blaine receives more hugs and high fives than he has ever before and he returns them just as enthusiastically.

They’re still shouting at each other when they’re back in their dressing room so Mr Schue has to yell to get their attention.

“GUYS!” He pauses until they all look at him. “You have a visitor,” he says, gesturing to the door. Blaine’s jaw drops when he sees Kurt standing there, Elliott in his shadow.

Kurt immediately gets pounced on by his former glee club members, so Blaine goes to wrap Elliott in a hug.

“You killed it,” Elliott tells him softly when he has his arms wrapped around Blaine and Blaine smiles into Elliott’s neck.

“Thank you.”

He turns back to the group once they let go of each other, grinning at Kurt who is currently getting bombarded with questions by Tina and Sam. He looks up and catches Blaine’s smile, subtly giving him the ‘perfect’ sign.

“Who’s your yummy friend, Blaine?” Unique demands, suddenly appearing next to him, sliding her arm under Blaine’s. Kurt winks at him, causing Blaine to blush as he turns to introduce Unique and Elliott.

 

**

 

Elliott convinces Blaine to go to a gay bar for their date, ignoring Blaine’s protests that he’s underage.

“I’m not trying to get you drunk, it’s just a nice place to hang out and they have pool tables and stuff. I’m driving, so I’m not drinking either.”

So Blaine spends the first day of his spring break trying to figure out what to wear, because what do you wear on your first date with a guy in a Lima gay bar.

He decides on a white polo with thin black stripes and a burgundy cardigan paired with light brown pants. Today he forgoes the bowtie, he wants to impress Elliott but he also doesn’t want to look overdressed. He can still wear one if he and Elliott ever go to a fancy restaurant.

Blaine shakes his head; he can still daydream about potential future romantic dates later, now is the time to focus on the now. With a bit of cologne and some last drops of hair gel he feels as ready as he’ll ever be and turns away from his reflection before he changes his mind.

He still has a few minutes to kill until Elliott picks him up, so he uses the time to text Tina, soothing the onstream of questions she had been bombarding him with ever she found out he was going on a date with Elliott.

Elliott is perfectly on time and they spend the drive to the bar chit-chatting and although Blaine hopes it doesn’t show he’s nervous inside. He’s never been on a date, so he’s not sure how to act, constantly overthinking everything he says.

It has to show though, because the conversation is awkward and stilted, even though the relaxed feel was always one of the things Blaine loved most about hanging out with Elliott. Now he feels pressured, as if something big was looming ahead and he could mess it up with any word, any moment.

He’s relieved when they arrive at the bar, because there’s a lot more to distract him from always focusing on his words.

The doorman looks incredibly bored as he checks their IDs and marks Blaine’s hand with an x, wishing them a fun stay. There’s a few people in the bar, chatting quietly over some beers, hardly looking up when they walk in. The bar is a little tacky, but Blaine supposes he can’t expect too much from a midwestern gay bar called ‘Scandals’.

Blaine blushes when Elliott takes off his jacket and suddenly he feels a lot more optimistic about this working out.

“Do you want to play pool?” Elliott suggests, nodding towards the tables in the back or the room.

“I’ve never played,” Blaine admits, but Elliott just smiles.

“Well then I’m gonna teach you.”

Elliott goes to fetch them some drinks and the pool set while Blaine goes to the table, smoothing his hand over the wood. He’s seen people play of course so he has an approximate idea what it’s about but he doesn’t know anything about the rules. Hopefully he won’t embarrass himself too much, although he knows that Elliott won’t care if he hits all the balls or none of them.

“Okay, so what do I do?” Blaine asks when Elliott finishes preparing the game and hands him his cue.

“Well your goal is to get all of your set of balls into the holes, they’re called pockets. You see how some of them are fully colored and some have white circles on them?” Blaine nods. “You only focus on one type. Of course you can also get in the other ones but you’re helping me with that. You use the white one to get yours in, it’s the only one you’re allowed to hit directly. If you get one in you can play another time, if not it’s my turn, after you’ve finished getting all of yours in, you try to get the black 8 into the pocket across from where your last one went in, if you manage that, you’ve won the game.”

“That sounds doable,” Blaine says, nodding. “Who goes first?”

Elliott takes a step back, gesturing to the table. “You can. Just hit them, and whichever color ball you get in first will be yours.”

“Okay.” Blaine tries to remember what he saw of people playing pool, and places the cue on the table, resting it on his thumb.

“Can I show you something?” Elliott says, stepping forward. “Try using your middle finger, and close this one around the cue, so you can guide it more.” Blaine holds his breath as Elliott arranges his fingers. His heart hammers when Elliott guides his arm, then stands back so Blaine won’t smack him with the cue. He tries to focus on what he’s doing, shoots and it looks surprisingly good, the coloured balls rolling all over the table and he even gets one in.

“Good!” Elliott compliments, clapping his hands.

“You did most of the work,” Blaine retorts bashfully.

“I just gave you some pointers, it was still you playing. Come on, it’s still your turn.”

The gameplay and the music playing over the speakers helps them relax a little and get rid of the awkwardness, but there’s always underlying tension. Elliott wins the first game and Blaine the second, although he suspects that Elliott messed up a few of his shots on purpose. It’s a sweet gesture, though, he can see Elliott is trying hard to make him feel comfortable.

But that means that Elliott can probably feel that this is not what they made it out to be as well.

Blaine agrees when he suggests they get dinner afterward, although he feels like he’s going to his last meal. They decide on breadstix because it’s close by and you can’t go wrong with Italian food.

When they order, the awkward silence starts up again, at least until Elliott sighs, and takes a sip of his glass as if it’s pure whiskey to give him courage.

“Blaine, if I ask you something, can you answer honestly?”

Blaine’s stomach twists into knots but he nods, “Sure.”

“This is not working, is it?”

Blaine huffs and he can’t help but smile a little. He clears his throat. “No, not really, I think.”

“Oh god.” Elliott buries his face in his hands. “Why is this not working?”

“I don’t know?” Blaine feels bad for feeling so relieved but Elliott saying those words lifted a huge weight off his chest and he’s sure Elliott actually feels the same.

“I don’t get it, we always get along so well and you’re cute and hot, so it should be perfect.”

“I could say the same about you,” Blaine says, a flush creeping up his neck. “But I guess some people are just meant to be dating I guess,” he shrugs. “That doesn’t mean we can’t be friends, though.”

They get interrupted as the waitress sets down their plates. Elliott sighs as he unrolls his cutlery from the napkin. “I really hope so. I’d miss hanging out with you.”

“Me too.”

They fall into silence as they eat but for the first time today it’s not uncomfortable and making Blaine feel pressured to come up with something witty to say.

“This is my first date,” Blaine admits halfway through the meal. He’s not sure why he feels compelled to tell Elliott this, but he wants to be honest.

“Wait really?”

Blaine nods.

“Aw, man I’m sorry. Your first date should be better than this.”

“It’s pretty nice,” he replies, dragging his pasta through the sauce.

“Well, it’s not really a date anymore, is it?”

He shrugs and Elliott pats his hand which is lying on the table.

“I’m sorry if you’re disappointed. But I promise, there’s tons of guys out there who’d be lucky to date you.”

Blaine’s mind flickers to Kurt and he blushes, lowering his head. Even though they sort of undeclared this as a date, he feels guilty for thinking about another guy. What kind of person is he? He hopes that Elliott doesn’t notice but he seems to have hawkeyes.

“Wait, do you already have someone in line?”

“No!” Blaine exclaims, busying himself with eating pasta.

Elliott narrows his eyes on him, scrutinizing. “There is a guy.”

“It’s nothing.” He’s not really lying, it’s not like the small crush he’s had on Kurt since the day he met will ever lead somewhere.

Elliott looks like he wants to say something, but he decides against it, turning back to his meal.

“There’s no hard feelings here though, right? We just move on from this.”

“Yeah, I’d really like that.”

“Good,” Elliott says, nudging Blaine’s foot under the table. “But I really hope you’ll still share dessert with me.”

Blaine laughs at that, all the tension finally gone. “Of course I will.”

 

**

 

Blaine thought he would feel weirder about the whole thing with Elliott, but surprisingly he doesn’t. There is a little lull in their steady text-conversation a few days after their not-date, but they quickly recover and go back to normal. In retrospect, thinking about Elliott in a romantic way feels strange. Sure, he’s attractive, but you don’t have to want to go out with everyone you find attractive.

He doesn’t see Elliott again until Q&A’s Spring Break slash Easter party a week later. Before the party he’s nervous - he’s texted with Elliott and they have mutually agreed that everything will go back to the way it was, but he still fears that it will be awkward and a little weird.

It is, actually, but only in the beginning. The party is hosted at someone’s house in the suburbs of Columbus, and Elliott is the one opening the door when Blaine knocks.

They stare at each other awkwardly for a minute before Elliott breaks the silence.

“Oh, come on,” he says, before wrapping Blaine up in a tight embrace.

Blaine lets out a relieved laugh, returning the hug.

“Good to see you,” he tells Elliott as they part.

“You too. Come in! You want something to drink?”

Blaine follows Elliott into the open kitchen and living room, where a few people are already gathered. It’s a sunny and warm day, so the door to the terrace is wide open, letting in a light breeze.

The kitchen is full of snacks and drinks, although they’re planning to have a barbecue later. Music is playing, loud enough to be able to dance to it but also quiet enough to carry a conversation without having to shout.

After getting a glass of fruit punch Blaine scans the room. There are a lot of familiar faces, people he briefly met at Q&A. Kurt is nowhere to be seen, so he goes to join Andy and Elliott.

Andy is just waxing poetic about a movie they saw, gesticulating wildly while they go on about Nick Young and his struggles, their recently dyed-blonde hair falling over their eyes.

Blaine looks up to Elliott to exchange a look with him - Andy is so adorable when they get excited over something, but he notices Elliott is looking somewhere else.

He follows Elliot’s gaze until he sees what Elliott is so focused on.

There is a girl standing by the punch bowl, talking to someone else, laughing loudly at something the other must have said; her pink, wavy hair moving as she throws back her head. She gives off a rocker-vibe, but in a subtle way, her clothes also accentuating her femininity. Blaine can see why she caught Elliott’s attention.

He turns back his head, Elliott blushing when he realises he got caught. Andy excuses themself to the bathroom, leaving Elliott and Blaine alone.

“You should go talk to her,” Blaine says when Elliott makes no attempt to start a conversation.

Elliott looks down, like he just got caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

“Hey, we agreed to be friends right? Don’t friends help each other with that sort of thing?”

Elliott scrutinizes him, looking for any sign of jealousy. “Are you sure?” he says hesitantly, his eyes flickering to the girl. “It’s not weird for you?”

Blaine shrugs. “I mean I can’t judge. Even if it’s not going to work out with the guy I like.” He keeps his eyes on Elliott, forcing him not to look at Kurt, who he knows is standing nearby. Elliott sighs, rubbing his palms over his jeans.

“Okay. But I have to figure out if she’s into guys at first anyway, so…”

“Good luck,” Blaine smiles, raising his glass to toast Elliott, who meets him halfway with his glass, before downing the rest of his bowl.

Not wanting, to sit alone on the sofa, Blaine decides to mingle and meet new people, and catch up with others.

Kurt is deep in conversation and Elliott seems to be hitting it off with the girl he was eyeing, so Blaine joins Andy and Olive, catching up on what they’ve been doing during the last weeks.

The afternoon is full of lots of fun and food. Blaine meets even more incredible people, and although he’s usually not very quick to notice change in himself, he feels that now that burden is off his shoulders he’s able to talk a lot more open and freely, not constantly worrying what the other person might think of him.

After eating, when the crowd is dispersing into smaller groups again, Blaine notices the girl Elliott had been checking out. He’s surprised to see her with her friend again, instead of Elliott, as he’d expected. Although he finds it a little odd, he tries not to think too much of it. When he doesn’t see Elliott for another twenty minutes though, he decides to go look for him.

When he passes Andy on his way inside he stops them to ask, “Have you seen Elliott?”

“Uh, I think he’s inside with Kurt.” Blaine thanks them before heading to the living room.

The house is almost empty, everyone enjoying the warm weather outside. That’s how he can easily hear the raised voices.

He recognizes Kurt, who sounds angry. Blaine furrows his brows, concerned. It’s not like Kurt to get that aggravated and it’s even more unlikely that he would get cross with Elliott, if what Andy says is true. He follows the voices, planning to intervene - until he hears Kurt say his name.

“What about Blaine?”

“So that’s what this is about?” Elliott’s voice sounds calmer, almost annoyed.

“Of course it is. You can’t treat him like this!” Blaine feels his pulse quicken at Kurt’s protectiveness. It’s wrong to eavesdrop like this, especially on his friends, but he’s frozen on the spot, lingering in front of the slightly ajar door of the room Kurt and Elliott retreated to.

“Treat him like what?”

“You’re playing him,” Kurt bursts out. “You flirt with him, take him out and the next day you move on to someone else? You don’t even care enough to even try to be subtle about it!”

“You know Kurt, maybe you should try talking to Blaine, first before going all berserk on me.”

“What?”

“Just. You’re awfully protective over a guy you claim to only be friends with.”

Blaine doesn’t see it coming when the door suddenly swings open and Elliott storms out.

“Blaine.” His mouth twists into a smile when he realises who’s standing before him. “Look, there he is,” Elliott says, turning back to Kurt. “Now you can ask him.”

“Please tell him to get off my ass,” he sighs, facing Blaine again, before patting him on the shoulder and disappearing.

Blaine stands there awkwardly until Kurt sighs and gestures for him to come in. He closes the door halfway again. The room looks like an office, the wall covered with a bookshelf and a large desk covered in receipts and folders.

“How much exactly did you hear of that?” Kurt asks. He sounds embarrassed.

“What was that?” Blaine retorts. He doesn’t appreciate people going behind his back to fight his battles, as noble as their intentions may be.

“Oooohkay so you did hear enough,” Kurt lets out a fake giggle and Blaine can’t help but smile. He knows Kurt meant well.

“So. How’d your date with Elliott go then? I’m guessing something happened?”

“It was a disaster,” Blaine admits. Kurt’s face falls, so he rushes to add, “not in a we-can’t-look-each other-in-the-eye kinda way, just - we realised we weren’t exactly… dating material for each other.”

“Oh.”

“We agreed to leave it at that and forget about it.”

“I see.”

“And actually, I encouraged him to go talk to that girl.”

“You did?” Kurt tilts his head. “That’s very nice of you.”

Blaine shrugs. “Well, we’re friends. There’s no sense in both of us being miserable about it. And you can’t choose when someone new comes along.”

“That makes sense,” Kurt nods. They’re both silent and Blaine watches as Kurt shuffles his feet. “I feel like such a tool.”

Blaine is silent, doesn’t know what to reply.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”

Blaine shrugs his shoulders. “I think Elliott is the one you should apologize for.” He hesitates a moment, then continues. “Can I ask you something?”

Elliott’s words are repeating in his mind ever since he said them. _You’re awfully protective over a guy you claim to only be friends with._

“Sure.” Kurt’s face shows surprise, though he waits patiently for Blaine to find his words. Which is not an easy task. However, if he can work it out with Elliott he can do it with Kurt, he just needs to find his courage, and that is something he’s had a lot of practice with lately.

“What Elliott said, about you being protective…”

Kurt’s face flushes pink as he brings his attention back to his shoes, as if they were the most exquisite pair ever made.

If Kurt won’t meet him in the middle he’ll have to be even more bold.

“It’s just that, one part why I’m not so upset about it not working out with Elliott was that I sort of have a crush on another guy.”

Kurt meets his eyes now, looking even more confused.

Blaine suddenly realises how awkward this confession is from halfway across a room, so he slowly takes a few steps closer to Kurt.

“An amazing guy, who’s very inspiring and without whom I wouldn’t be standing here today.”

“Is it Freddie Mercury?” Kurt jokes. Blaine rolls his eyes, huffing out a laugh.

“Well, that too. But I never said anything to the other guy because I was so sure he didn’t see me that way, and that he was really far out of my league. Now I’m not so sure anymore, though.” Blaine closes the remaining distance between them. Standing right in front of Kurt, he can smell the spice of his cologne and make out the details of the pin fastening the scarf around his neck. Kurt’s incredible sense of fashion is something that he had always been aware of, but never really noticed.

Admitting his feelings to Kurt also means admitting them to himself, he realises. Because Kurt means more than just a casual flirt. And oh god, he just put his heart out there and now he knows it’s definitely _not_ the same as with Elliott, and he doesn’t know if he’ll take a rejection as lightly.

“Please tell me I’m not wrong?” It feels like the last straw, now it’s up to Kurt, who’s avoiding Blaine’s eyes again, wrapping his arms around his middle.

“Blaine…” Blaine holds his breath, refuses to let his thoughts get ahead of him.

“Elliott was right. I have been protective about you and not just because you’re my protégé or whatever I’ve been trying to tell myself.”

“What,” Blaine breathes, not quite believing his ears.

“I do like you, i just felt that it wasn’t appropriate. I wanted to be there for you as a friend, not creep on you. And I was so mad at myself when I heard that you and Elliott were going out. And then when I saw Elliott with that girl and I thought I’d lost my chance just for him to screw you over… I overreacted, I’m sorry.”

“I know you meant well,” Blaine soothes him, trying to look calm, while on the inside his stomach is doing somersaults.

“So you do like me?” He just has to ask, get confirmation that it’s really true.

Kurt laughs, his eyes crinkling. “Of course I do. A lot.”

“Good,” Blaine smiles broadly. “I do, too.”

“We’re both idiots aren’t we?” Kurt sighs. “And I screwed up things with Elliott.”

“He’s not a resentful guy,” Blaine assures him. “I’m sure if you go talk to him he’ll forgive you. I can go with you if you, if you want?”

“You’re such a good person, Blaine Anderson.”

Blaine shakes his head. “I just want everyone to be happy.”

“Okay, how about this: we go talk to Elliott, and then we can talk about where we’re going to have our first date.” Blaine blushes at the words and he’s pretty sure his heart just skipped a beat. He’ll be going on an actual date with Kurt. And he feels confident it’s not going to end up the same way as with Elliott.

“That- That sounds amazing.”

“Good.” Kurt smiles, holding up a hand. It takes Blaine a moment to realise that Kurt wants him to take it. When he does, it feels right, and he doesn’t want to let go.

As Kurt leads him outside, he thinks back to where he was only last year - at Dalton, where he was out but still hiding in his safe haven, avoiding people he didn’t really know. Back then, he never would have believed that so quickly he would find support in the most amazing group of friends he’s ever made, be out to his peers at a public school and going on dates on the side. Change came unexpectedly from a situation he thought was bad, but with only some pushes he was able to turn his life around. And he’ll never let anything keep him from enjoying it again.

 

 

 

****

 

Thank you so much to gleekmom for the wonderful cover art <3

**Author's Note:**

> Q&A - Queers & Allies, is a name that i found on a website according to which is the name of the LGBT* group at the University of Missouri.  
> The Columbus Gay Men's Chorous is just as awesome as Andy thinks they are, so be sure to watch their performance of 'Born This Way' on YouTube.  
> The song ND sing to Blaine is called "Be Okay" which is a beautiful song by A Great Big World, whose song "This Is The New Year" also acted as the name giver to this piece.  
> Like Blaine, I encourage you to find friends who will support you no matter what, who will accept you with all your antics and who won't judge you for who you do or do not love.
> 
> Thank you for reading <3


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